Good lord, how did I become Thirty?

Today I have officially finished my third decade. And because this is a big year, I am entitled to reminisce. I was thinking about my state of mind with I finished my first and second decades and how they differ from this one.

At ten, lets see, that would be grade five. I was all head in the clouds about most things and was happy with the challenges of learning long division and seeing how many boys I could beat at cross country running. The biggest worry in my life was my sister who taunted me by asking if I was homosexual or heterosexual ("I live at home," I used to answer plaintively and then have to run to mom when the response was evil older sister giggles.) Little did I know that far worse tortures were to come: my teen years.

When I hit twenty, I was so happy and relieved that a was no longer a teenager. That ever present cloud of self doubt and loathing was lifting slowly in the sunshine that is University and all the self reliance that goes with it. All doors were open. I could do anything if I wanted to.

At thirty, I look back and think, wow, those twenties were a crazy ride. And where am I spending my thirtieth birthday? Didn't see that one coming! What a crazy adventure I am on! But of course uncertainty is always scary and I admit to some jealousy of old friends who have jobs and houses and the such. There is the looming possible future of unemployment or, possibly worse, lame-employment. Where will we settle down? Please god don't let me end up in New Jersey.

I would be lying to you and myself if I didn't mention that my biological clock is ticking. It is ticking so loudly that I think at any moment my uterus could start gonging out the tune of Westminster Quarters like a clock tower. And the Israelis don't help. It seem like everywoman, including the female cats, are pregnant and/or herding around a litter of progeny. At my age, seeing so many protruding female bellies is a little disconcerting.

With all of this pressure, I have to remind myself to "Revel in the selfishness of academic research while you can! Enjoy your young marriage! Explore Israel! Screw the house, two cars and the dog! All in good time! This is far more interesting!"

With that little self pep talk, I am going to go to bed to get some rest to prepare for the new adventures that thirty-plus-one-day will bring.