I have yet to find shortening here, lard of course would take an act of god, but I did find packages of premade pastry in the freezer section last night. I picked one with a promising looking pictures on the package. I let it thaw in the fridge overnight and this morning got up nice and early to make warm, gooey, melt-in-your-mouth butter tarts.
You know, sometimes you just have to laugh. This is what happened:
Hopefully this is not foreshadowing for tomorrow's turkey.
Update: it is 11:23 am and I am cleaning the pan. I took the buttertarts to work anyway after taste testing one for breakfast. Despite looking odd, the locals didn't know any better and gobbled them all up.
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